There were so many moments I called it kindness — the over-explaining, the people-pleasing, the fixing. The many ways I’d dim just enough to stay digestible. I thought I was being thoughtful, but really, I was negotiating my worth. Chasing love through self-sacrifice. Trying to be chosen by proving I could fit in anywhere. Until, in quiet meditation, the lighthouse metaphor found me.
Unbothered by the tide of feelings. Unshaken by the thoughts that drift away. Just… steady. Observant. Still.
This design came from that moment.
A soft, powerful knowing: a remembrance of my inherent worth.
Lighthouses don’t chase boats.
They just shine.
There’s a phrase that found me a few days ago while I was quietly untangling some inner noise:
“Lighthouses don’t chase boats.”
At first, it felt like a simple reminder not to people-please. But the more I sat with it, the more it revealed itself as more than a clever quote. It was a spiritual anchor.
A lighthouse stands, unmoving. It doesn't yell. It doesn't steer the ships. It doesn't wonder if it's doing enough.
It just is. And in its being, it guides.
The Chase
So much of modern life is designed around the chase.
Chasing relevance. Chasing connection. Chasing income.
Even in spiritual communities, there’s often a subtle hustle: to be more present, more healed, more enlightened.
But the chase is a symptom of something deeper: a belief that we are incomplete unless we are chosen, mirrored, or validated.
And I get it. I’ve chased too.
I’ve chased relationships that didn’t see me.
I’ve chased outcomes I thought I needed.
I’ve even chased my own healing, mistaking urgency for readiness.
The thing is, the chase is exhausting because it pulls us out of presence — out of our own frequency — and into someone else’s waters.
The Beam
A lighthouse, on the other hand, doesn’t adjust its beam for every ship.
It doesn’t dim itself to make others comfortable.
It doesn’t flicker brighter to be noticed.
It doesn’t lose sleep wondering whether a boat took the long way around.
Its job is singular: to shine.
That’s it.
It doesn’t rescue. It doesn’t explain itself. It just radiates alignment, and trusts that those navigating the dark will see it when they’re ready.
And that’s when I realized:
This wasn’t about detachment. It wasn’t about not caring.
It was about redefining devotion — to self, to personal truth, to the path I came here to walk, regardless of who understands or wants to joins me on it.
Self-Leadership as Frequency
I used to think leadership was about knowing the way.
It’s not.
It’s about holding your light, especially when the fog rolls in.
Self-leadership doesn’t mean you never waver. It means you remember.
You remember who you are when others forget.
You remember your center when emotions swell.
You remember that your light — your presence, your integrity, your resonance — how you move through the world speaks more powerfully than any words could ever do.
This design was born from that moment of remembering.
It came through in a quiet meditation where I saw a version of myself chasing clarity in someone else’s ocean.
Yet, all along, I was the lighthouse.
The Boats Will Do What They Do
The boats symbolize so much.
They’re the relationships we long for, the clients we wish would come, the validation we hope to receive, the visibility we think we need.
But the boats have their own path.
You can’t force a boat to see you.
You can’t swim after it hoping it will change course.
You are a lighthouse.
You can only stand where you are, in your clarity, and let the ones who are meant to find you… find you.
And maybe that’s the hardest part — letting go of the need to be found in order to become the finding.
Not Chasing Isn’t Apathy — It’s Alignment
When I wear this design, it reminds me that stillness is not passivity.
That shining my truest and most vulnerable expression is not ego.
That holding your light steady is a courageous act in a world that teaches us to market, bend, and chase.
This message isn’t just for me.
It’s for all of us who have dimmed ourselves trying to be chosen.
It’s for those who are tired of explaining their worth.
It’s for the ones who are ready to embody their truth without needing others to clap for it.
This design is an invitation to remember: You don’t have to chase. The ones meant for you will never require you to shrink to feel seen.
Until then…
Shine anyway.
Remember who you are,
Fellow EarthShiner
This is wonderful! Past read like poetry. I love it.